Review – Rocks Off RO-80mm

♦ Disclaimer: I was provided with a free Rocks Off RO-80mm by The Boudoir in exchange for my honest review. Your Mileage May Vary.

The RO-80mm by UK sex toy manufacturer Rocks Off is arguably one of the most famous bullet vibrators there is. Not only is it used to power the vast majority of other Rocks Off toys (like the Rock Chick, Bad Boy, etc.), but it seems to be generally touted as THE bullet vibe.

Well, I’ve finally tried one and now you get to read my review, without me making any awful ammunition/gun-related references.

The RO-80mm comes in a clear plastic tube not much bigger than the toy itself, with a little pop-off lid and some information on a sticker on the side. The packaging is fantastic as it’s no fuss and great for travel and storage.

The bullet is made from body-safe ABS plastic and comes in several different colours, though mine is a lovely shiny black. The battery cap is silvered plastic and twists off to change batteries. On the end of the cap is a rubber push button that turns the vibrator on and off. This button is a little tricky, I find, as it depresses a long way and starts the vibe long before it clicks in, meaning I often have to try a few times to get it to stay on.

The RO-80mm is small (being about finger-sized), very light and nicely shaped with the tip curving nicely into a precise point. I love bullets that are actually bullet-shaped because they’re very versatile: the tip allows focused use and the side of the tip can be used for wider vibration and less pointy pressure.

It takes a single N size battery, which is going to be supremely annoying when it runs out. I can barely find AAAs or AAs when I need them and I’m pretty sure my house contains no N batteries except this one. Toys with annoying batteries have to go the extra mile to please, because they have to ensure they’re good enough that I’ll go to the effort of buying their weird batteries after they go kaput.

The bullet is single-speed and I’m the kind of person that tends to just whack a vibrator to the highest speed and stick to it anyway, so as long as the single speed is decent, that’s fine. This is where I have my main problem with the RO-80mm. I’ve heard people rave about this thing because the vibrations are so strong, but I’m honestly not feeling it.

It just doesn’t seem much stronger than any other bullet. I suppose the vibrations are decent enough, but they’re incredibly surface-buzzy and just don’t rumble or go deep enough for me. If surface-buzzy is your thing, though, you might well feel this is a lot stronger. I like a vibrator to make me go “Ooh!” when I apply it to my clitoris, but with this it was just “Oh, hey, I guess there’s some buzzing down there sorta.” With enough effort it makes me come, but I’d choose almost any bullet I own over this.

On the plus side, and this is great news if you’ve already decided buzzy vibrations are for you, it’s a very discreet bullet. It is small and very quiet. This is perhaps why so many people love the RO-80mm. I have no shame, so I don’t care if my housemates hear buzzing, but I know a lot of people prefer quiet vibrators and see noise as an important issue. Not only could we not hear it through the door, but I’ve successfully covered up the sound with just my ample thighs and the low hum of a computer fan. So it’s quiet.

It’s waterproof too, which makes it extra awesome and versatile. It also makes it a lot easier to clean, but I wouldn’t go as far as saying it’s easy because the engraved logo is a bit of a bitch. I ended up with stuff stuck in those thin lines, mouse-cheese style (you know, how your computer mouse picks up crap in the grooves). Getting it out was a pain.

CONCLUSION

Rocks Off RO-80mm is a dinky little bullet that is quiet, discreet and travels well. It is shaped very nicely, but I find that personally it doesn’t stand up to the claims about its strength. Its vibrations are nothing to write home about and are made less impressive by the fact that they are shallow and buzzy rather than having the rumbliness I prefer.

I’ll be honest, I’ve been horribly spoiled for bullets by the amazing We Vibe Tango and Salsa, but even looking at bullets purely in the RO-80mm’s price range, I’m not amazed. That said, it has many good points, is cheap and, impressively, waterproof. If you don’t mind a slight lack in power or you’re the kind that prefers surface or buzzy vibration, you’d probably like this toy. Plenty of people do, just not me.

I’d honestly recommend looking at the We Vibe bullets, which (though more expensive) are way stronger, better and rechargeable so you spend less on daft-sized batteries. If you do want a Rocks Off RO-80mm, though, you can get one very cheaply at The Boudoir. ♦

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